I Want to Go to There.

live-as-a-teen:

dogepom:

patickstump:

if you shame girls about their breast size i will push you into traffic

"Who’s flat now?"

whos flat now

speedlimit15:

*pronounces “hors d’oeuvres” as “horse divorce”*

actualmenacebuckybarnes:

carnilia:

demisexualsteve:

imagine steve becoming increasingly worried because of all the casual misogyny and he talks about it with bucky

next thing you know bewildered young girls are telling everyone about that one time the winter soldier rescued them from street harassment

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM SO H A P P Y

"heeey baby, wanna suck-"

"SUCK THIS" *punches dick w metal fist*

thesugarhole:

if we are talking in person and i accidentally spit dont even call out i saw it and im dead inside

partybarackisinthehousetonight:

dear board of education, 
i am too

gnarly:

how your face feels after the dentist

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Operator: 911 what is your emergency?
Me: Marvel has released Age of Ultron stills
For better or worse, Tony Stark has devised a plan that won’t require him to put on the Iron Man suit anymore, and should allow Captain America, Thor, Black Widow, Hawkeye, and the Hulk to get some much needed R&R as well. His solution is Ultron, self-aware, self-teaching, artificial intelligence designed to help assess threats, and direct Stark’s Iron Legion of drones to battle evildoers instead.
The only problem? Ultron lacks the human touch, and his superior intellect quickly determines that life on Earth would go a lot smoother if he just got rid of Public Enemy No. 1: Human beings.
AVENGERS 2: AGE OF ULTRON plot details (x)
harry potter: you're the weak one. you'll never know love, or friendship. and i feel sorry for you.
voldemort: i came out to have a good time and i’m honestly feeling so attacked right now

shannibal-cannibal:

inkyubus:

sandandglass:

President Barack Obama at the White House Correpondents’ Dinner. 

OBAMA HAS TOTALLY STOPPED GIVING A FUCK AND IT’S THE GREATEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN

this shit was brutal

tertiusvonfluffenwelter:

FUN FACT of the DAY: BOOBYTRAP backwards spells PARTYBOOB

iceepr1ncess:

literally nothing feels better than being loved by someone who hates everyone

donttouchmydestiel:

pancakestein:

you’re standing on a life-sized map

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